Love is... Part 11

Photo From "View from wits end" (Credit in the corner)

Love Never Fails... 




The biggest part of love is that it does not fail, ever! The true, pure form of love never ends or fails. It's always there, and does not lose its potency. This hits home the most for me when I relate to the fact that God is love. God will never fail you. 


"The Lord appeared to us in the past, saying: 'I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness."
(Jeremiah 31:3)


This is one of my favorite verses, it defines who I am and my identity. "Everlasting Love" is a powerful phrase. It means that it is always at its full strength, it never began with something you did, and it will never end no matter what you do. It is infinite and it never fails. But the part that is convicting is that we are to love people in that way as well. To not have conditional love, where it started with them being good and ends with their mistake.


The most encouraging thing that I can think is that God is "Everlasting Love". Whenever I "mess up", "miss the mark", "sin", or "fall short", I become overwhelmed with guilt. Conviction that leads to repentance is a wonderful thing, but after you have repented guilt is purely from the Devil. When you feel guilty you run away from God, you are like the prodigal son who feels as if he cannot be his father's son again because he is so lowly. But God is that father who clothes his son and places a ring on his finger, he rejoices that his son came back, repented for what he did, and even though he is dirty he cleans him off and holds a feast.
This is Everlasting love. God sees every mistake you will make before and after you are "saved", and He still died for you. He knows that you will sin that day, but he still loves you. In will never end and it never started with a "good deed".


This is the type of love that never fails that we are expected to have as well. Not judging a person on their past, and to not lower our value or love for a person when they do something that hurts or disappoints us. You do not value a person on how they act or treat you, but you value them because the are a person.


The part after "love never fails" talks about how all the gifts people want to have will come to an end eventually, that they can all fail. But to be gifted with Love for others, that will never fail or go wrong.
I feel that most churches either push for gifts, or they will deny them completely. But the issue is that we want people to have prophecy, or the gift of tongues, and not the gift of love. The greatest gift of all the ones listed is love, it is the one that will not fail.


Instead of praying for tongues, maybe you should be praying harder for the gift of love. To grow in this area many hardships may come up to help your "love muscle" to grow.


I wanted to make this one short. If you just dwell on the principle in the Bible, and take another look at the past 10 parts, you can learn more for yourself than I can write down in a few days. So let's grow in love together, and grow in our knowledge of God's love as well.


Refining the faith,
-C.A.M. 

Love is... Part 10

Photo Credit: cute-pictures.blogspot

Love is... Always protecting, trusting, hoping, and preserving. 




So, we recently got through Valentines Day, the day that people either think is wonderful or horrible. I don't really agree with the way love is put forward for this, where men are required to give expensive gifts to women to prove that they care for them. Yet, it is a great time to reflect on the true nature of pure love. I focused on dwelling on God's love, it's eternal, unselfish, and unblemished. There's one more part of the Love series after this one, so let's make this a good one! 




Someone who "always protects, always trusts, always hopes, (and) always preserves" sounds like the ideal person! This is the love of God, this is the love that Christ showed us, and this is the love that the Holy Spirit empowers us to be able to show to others. "Agape" is the love in which the one giving it has no conditions and no expectations from loving the other person. This is the word used in Greek when describing God's love. It is pure, not sexual or romantic, and is simply caring for someone, no matter what they do or don't do. This is the love you show to your Enemies, and everyone else, not expecting them to love you back but loving them anyways. It's because of God's Agape that we are able to love Him.
"We love, because He first loved us." (1 John 4:19)


Let's try to just go through each part of this section, one by one. 




"Always Protects" 


To "Always protect" reminds me of a service man or a knight. The Police, EMTs, and Fire Men are there to protect the general public. They put others lives before their own and work hard to keep us safe and alive. They stand by, waiting for us to call on them. They are pretty much the closest thing we have to a superhero, but instead of a "Bat Signal" we call 911. I realize that they are not perfect, we all make mistakes, but they are people who live the life of "Always protect". 
The other thing I think of is a Knight, like the ones from our Childhood books. They fought monsters, fire breathing dragons, and rescued the town and the princess. In the books for the older audience they will probably die fighting. While the people mourn and honor them, they do not care that they died if it was to save another, and the only regret is that they are no longer alive to protect them. Knights of our dream land are "chivalrous", and little boys want to be like them!


At least, they used to. Being blunt here, but this is not a value that we are taught anymore. To open doors, ward off bad guys, and come to the rescue of women is not as important. Little boys like the guns and swords, but a lot of them think that the bad guy is cool! Most start watching MTV at a young age and want to be the "Player' when they grow up. These are the people who wound those around them, emotionally and physically. Men were created stronger to protect women, yet this is being lost. Now, women can also be noble and protect! They protect family and friends. I think that getting the value of protecting others at any cost needs to come back into the trends. 


"Regular" people don't die in battle and fight fires to protect, and this applies to those who do as well. We protect the feelings of others, their emotions. To love and protect people can be interfering when someone is being bullied. When you see someone being hurt, or who is potentially going to get hurt, you jump in and help them and protect them. In "modern times" we are able to do this more than we know. So, let's take a stand and protect those around us. 




"Always Trusts"


This one sounds very difficult to me, and probably to most people. To always trust? God, don't you know how much I have been hurt? How can I possibly trust people? To trust a person is extremely difficult for those of us who has been "burned" in the past. Example? One of the first times I did a "trust fall" they thought it would be funny to drop me on purpose...Onto the hard, rocky ground. I don't like trust falls anymore. But I had to do one recently with my roommates, and although it was hard it taught me a lesson. 


They caught me. Despite what happen years ago, they still caught me. Because we loved each other, and we did not want to see one another fall. To really love a person you need to trust them. Being suspicious, judgmental, or just thinking that they will let you down and have some sort of fault, drives a wedge in any relationship. It's a delicate balance, I think, because you both need to trust people, but do not rely on them to be perfect for you. Knowing a person has faults, and also not distrusting them for those faults. You love through mistakes and know we all make them, but still trust them. 


I know this may all sound confusing, but it's hard to put feelings into words. You also need to be a trustworthy person yourself, someone who is not back-stabbing, or sneaky, or that hides things from people. Trust and be trustable. 




"Always Hopes"


To always hope, in my opinion, is to see the light in every situation. It''s the opposite of despair. You are hopeful for the future, you have hope that things will get better in the most dire of times, and you hope the best for others as well. Love is about showing it to others, but it is also something internal. You always trust people and you always have hope. To be a hopeful, uplifting person draws people to you. Being an optimist makes people around you positive as well. 


When a person is in despair and you can give them hope, that is showing love to them. You make them see that things will get better, you tell them you are praying for them and hope for the best, and you want things to go in their best interests. And, to have hope, you trust God and love Him and believe in the love He has for you. 




"Always Preserves"


We preserve rain forests, trees, animal life, and human lives. We protect them so that we can preserve them. It's keeping something safe so that it is able to grow. Like a nursery for plants, or children for that matter! It is a safe place where they can mature. We should be a safe place that people can go to when they need to heal and can stay when they are tender and growing. This is more of a Maternal or Paternal instinct, when your parents want to keep you safe for your own good so that you can become a responsible and stable adult. 


God, as our Father, shows this aspect, as well as all of them of course. He wants to nurture us and help us grow. We should be this way towards others. Protecting them from harm, and helping them grow. It's shows love and value for a person when you care for their well being and development. 




I think that these are very important for love, and we all have our own definition for the words. This is my opinion on what these mean, and I hope that it can get your mind going on what you think of these. Just remember that God has all of these traits, in their perfect, pure forms, and so does Christ and the Holy Spirit. And every time that The Bible says to love another person, it means all of these things. Love is a deep feeling, and I am excited to be able to wrap this up with next times final word on Love.


For now, let's dwell on these and continue to grow in Agape.  


Refining the Faith, 
-C.A.M.

An Alumni and Her Recent Thoughts

So this is probably going to be the longest and most honest, journal-like blog post that I've ever done. This is a post about my thoughts "Post H.A." as people have called it.

If you don't care much for my personal life I suggest you don't read this because it's one of the more "me" posts then the others, which are more just focused on God.

First of all I am now an Alumni of Teen Manias internship program called the Honor Academy (aka the HA). I lived in East Texas for one year (Aug.13th 2010 -Aug.13th 2011) with a schedule that usually was from 5am until 12am filled with working in a ministry, taking classes to develop myself as a leader, growing in relationships with my 5 roommates and my "family" of 40 people as well and my friends, and finally working as leadership for the drama program to use acting as a tool of worship to reflect the Lord. That's the most generic and general way to put it, because, as they said all year, "One year never meant so much."

So...What now? It's now September and I graduated in August. At first I was planning on staying a second year, I even arranged everything to make it possible. But, as God did with a lot of Interns, I was told to not stay by Him. This was one of the hardest things to give up, I wanted to be a Graduate Intern so badly but I knew that I was being called into a different season then that. So I ended up leaving and not coming back. Now I am at home and I am trying to get re-settled in and to get started on my career. I plan on being a writer and also I want to do traveling worship and prayer ministry in the future, but all things are in God's hands for wherever He steers me.

Being in "the world" is a difficult thing. I was so used too being around over 300 on-fire Christians, working in a ministry, being required to read the Bible and spend time in a prayer room, etc. And now I am not "required" to do that anymore. It's a huge challenge to do things you aren't required to do. Complacency sneaks up on you with the "I'll do it later" mentality and being satisfied with whatever. The days I don't spend time with God I desire it and I know that I need it. I want to spend time in prayer and worship so badly, yet temptation to not do it keeps trying to come into the picture. I've learned that sometimes I need to just verbally say "No" to things that I do to stop myself (or "my flesh")

It's difficult being away from Teen Mania and I am finding it hard to adjust but I am getting there. I thank God that I have such understanding parents to help me get used to this different style of life and for their patience with me.

Now for one of the biggest things that has been on my mind lately.

Girls, we all know that we love our romantic movies, novels etc. and that we can see ourselves married with children to any guy we see if we want to (I know men, this kinda freaks you out. Women have crazy imaginations!)

I was always told "guard your heart" at the HA. Well, for women it's the heart and the mind (where guys are told heart and eyes)

I have to guard my mind a lot. Being perfectly honest I didn't date for a year because I was an intern and even before then I never dated anybody. Well, now I'm getting older, my friends are in relationships and I am allowed to date. The things though is that this can utterly consume my mind! It's annoying frankly...

That is why I took on the Character Development challenge to not date for another year after the internship. So I am not going to e romantically involved with anyone until August 13th 2012 (exactly one year since I was allowed to date)

I have been convicted on several things lately.

First, I was thinking lately, "wow, I wish I could have an amazing romance like the ones I have been hearing about..." And I heard a whisper to me heart.

"I have already given you the ultimate romance, I gave my life for you."

Wow.... Conviction slap in the face!

Jesus is already the ultimate love story and company to me. He has my heart and is the one I am devoted to. Yet it gets so hard when you want to be with somebody but you know you are not ready yet. I am not saying we should all be single, solitary nuns for our whole lives, but there is a part of our hearts that can only be satisfied with the love of the Lord, the "God shaped hole" that we all have. I can't fill that with anyone else because the Lord is my satisfaction. I am still trying to remember this and luckily the things I am doing to prepare for my books have been drawing me closer to the Lord.

Second... So there are girls out there who like many guys at the same time (To quote HomestarRunner.com, "I have a crush on every boy!")

I'm a little bit different, but I am sure there are other girls out there who are like me.

I only can have feelings for one person at a time. The problem is that instead of having puppy dog feelings that can be taken away easily, I get attatched. This is something I have been trying to work on for a long time, and by the grace of God I am getting better with it. The first person I had feelings for lasted about 8 years when I was younger. I have to guard my mind a lot because I don't like being emotionally attached to people that I should not be. My mind has been too active when thinking about dating and it takes too much away from my relationship with Christ. So that is the other reason that I am not going to be in ANY romantic relationship for a year, because it is was to distracting for me with the season of life that I am in right now and my age. And I don't want to get attached to a person if I am not sure if we are best together or compatible.

(The reason I am writing this is because generally when I write about things it helps me get over them, in case you were wondering)

There is a lot more I could say about this, but I am not going to say too much about my personal life.

I do want to extend this challenge out to anyone reading this though!

For all you singles out there, would you be willing to join me in a commitment to not date and channel all energy into growing in the Lord and in personal maturity? (plus I figure that if that person really wants to be with you they will wait a year haha) It would be great to have more people doing this, but I'm doing it no matter who else does it!

So my life has been moving in and unpacking, decorating my room and the house for my parents, serving in ministry and giving what I can, pushing myself away from any complacency, committing to not dating for another year, and working on getting a book ready to publish while learning more about music and how to be a self-supporting adult! *whew* (yet I still don't feel at busy as I did as an Intern)

I miss everybody very much but I know the Lord is going to do amazing things with the different paths He is sending us all on. I hope I get to meet my HA August 2011 classmates on the road in the future!

Keeping the Faith,

C.A.M

(P.S. I bet a few of my friends and family are thinking, "Who is it that you are trying to not get too attached to?" Well, you don't get to know, so there! I am not talking about it until August 2012 at the earliest hahaha)

Do You Believe in Magic? Part 2

Okay so to answer the question I'm just going to post my answer.

Question 4

I would be interested to hear about what you think love is. You explain that you believe in it, but you don't really define it very much (outside of a vague definition).

The word "love" has been watered down so much in the english language. I can love my family, friends, chips, music, actor, singer, animal, spouse, and car without using a different word. People think this makes it easier, but to me it's just annoying honestly... There are many different words for love and I'm going to use the Hebrew words.

I happen to love Song of Solomon/Songs, it's an amazing book that get overlooked so many times! It's a love poem between a man and a woman and it shows what we think of as "romantic love" really is. In it there are three different words used that were all replaced with "love" in our current bibles.

ra‘yah

This is love between friends, companions, etc. When they are so close to you and you can trust them completely.

ahava

This is the strong, committed love. When you want to be with that person more than anything and is the love that lasts. This is a love of people who are committed to each other and a deep emotional love.

dod

This is the physical love. To be perfectly blunt it sex. This is the love God created for husbands and wives to have that is a deep physical connection.

When I refere to "Love", to true love, I mean all three of these together. When you are married and have all three of these in your life, that is "love" that I'm talking about.

And as a side note Agape love is love of God, selfless love, and I believe you need this type of "love" towards everybody as a christian but you mainly need this type of love in a relationship with that special person, willing to sacrifice anything for them!

So to answer the question, there you go. That is all what I mean by love. Ra'yah is like a type of soulmate, a trustworthy person you feel connected with as a friend and companion. Ahava is when you get closer to them and you cannot stand being separated because you are connected so deeply on a spiritual level. And Dod when you are married and have the physical and sexual aspect of a relationship. And when all of these come together that's becoming "One Flesh" and that's the type of love I believe in, it's a friendship, commitment, and a physical connection, not just the watered down medias version of love that's all fuzzys and "falling for people" And I believe in all of the individual loves as well, but I mainly was referring to Ahava and all three when put together.

I hope that is a good explanation and what answer you were looking for. I mostly get this from when I watch Rob Bell

( http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x3d5sy_nooma-flame-002_creation )

But this isn't just a copy mind you, I really agree and believe what he says and that's why I use his explanation because it's the best way I've come across to use when describing "love" so feel free to watch that and see what I mean.

Once again let me know about any more questions or replies!

-Keeping the Faith,

C.A.M

Do You Believe in Magic?

Soulmates, love, and relationships. This is what people talk about constantly and they debate and try to figure out things. I'm still sorting out my exact feelings on the matter and thought I would post my recent changes to my personal beliefs.

Question 1

Do you believe in love in general?

Yes I do, but I believe that love isn't just a fuzzy emotion, it's a commitment. Some of my favorite quotes are;

"You don't fall in love, you step up to it." "Love isn't staring deeply into each others eyes, but two people looking towards the same thing."

Sometimes we get so caught up in the romantic and emotional part of love that we forget it's more than that. And especially as christians since we also have our "Godly/holy/brotherly love" That is, showing how God loves us to others.

So yes, I do believe in love, and I believe in all the types of love and different ways of showing love etc.

Question 2

Do you believe in "Love at first sight"?

No, I do not. In relationships there are levels that we go in to. I've been reading about this in the book "Every Young Woman's Battle" which is about relationships which explains it best to me so far.

The first level is "Attention" This is when you are in a mall, church, school, walking down the street, in a car, and so on and so forth. You see somebody who fits what you like physically. Does this mean you should run over and get their info and plan a wedding date? No. Chances are that everyone in their life has seen lots of people that "got their attention" and if we live in cities or travel then you will see a lot more. This is not a "sin" or "bad" either. When you notice a person, you just notice them. And you may even get a rush if they notice you back. But this is not love at first sight, just noticing each other. Because the next level is "Attraction" This is when you start to get to know the person and you like them for their laugh, personality, jokes, interests, etc. It's getting to know the real person and liking them. This is where you can start to develop real feelings for a person. Leading me to...

Question 3

Do you believe in "Soulmates"?

Yes and No.

Now in my opinion you don't find your soulmate because you saw them went "doki doki" (aka heart pounded) and then said "They are meant for me!" like in Sleepless in Seattle. But, the person will get your attention first. After that you may get t know them and see that you are attracted to them, they like the same things as you do and are just what you need in your life! Because in my opinion a "soulmate" is a person tailor made by God to "fit your mold" and is right for you. Because for some people God made a person just right for them. And as a bit of a side note, not all people are meant to get married. This may sound sad but it's true and this isn't their fault of choice. God just has certain people remain single to better serve Him. But once again you can't just think "that's me" and go with that because only God knows. For a while I thought "I must be meant to be single because of the ministry I feel called for." But I don't know for sure, I would love to have that tailor made person.

Also, to me, a soulmate isn't just a person you just met and suddenly know you want to be with them (though it can be) it can also be a person you've known for a long time and as you get older and change into the people God made you to be you may see that you fit each other perfectly. I know people who met in grade school and have been married for over thirty years! I also know people who met and a few months later were married and have been together for about thirty years. "Soulmate" just means a person who was made for you. You are not two half's of a soul who only have a soul when you come together, you are two whole people who come together to make a much better whole.

And yes, there are a lot of people who ask things like "What if one of you dies? And they you get remarried. Were you supposed to be with the first, second, or both? And I'll be blunt and say, I don't know! Nobody really does! Because, like in most everything, only God knows all about these things. We may try to figure it out and fight over who is right but we don't really know who is. There are a lot of questions when it comes to soulmates that I don't really want to get into right now. But I will say that that is my opinion as of right now.

I'd like to say that hearing other opinions on this is something I love. I don't know everything and hearing the beliefs of others helps me figure out my own at times. So feel welcome to comment on what you think, or question you may have for me, I would love to hear them!

Well that's all for now folks, T.T.F.N!

(Genesis 2:24)

-Keeping the Faith,

C.A.M

Back and Forth

Have you ever had to watch the person you love be with another person? And all you can think is that you would treat them better as the person they are with treats them like dirt? You look at them together and you think "you're so much more valuable than this." And you wonder why they keep going back to that person who doesn't even love them when you know you love them and would be better to them. I've experienced a very mild case of this before and I've seen it happen to my friends and it was one of the most painful things for me to watch. I was thinking that I would never be that stupid as to be with the person using me instead of the one who truly loved me... Then I realized that I was doing the exact same thing.

I kept going back to the world time and time again instead of staying loyal to God. He was trying to tell me every day how much He loves me and was trying to make me see the better choice. I would go to Him, feel his love and relax in His presence and the joy He gave me. But for some reason I just kept leaving. I kept on going back to the world for periods of time. Weather it was a week or a year or even years I would go to the world and come back crying to God. No matter how many times I was treated badly or scarred or tossed aside by the world I would go back for some reason. I couldn't understand it myself just like how I couldn't understand the people with their boy/girl friends who were abusing them could get them to come back practically begging for more.

I also had two types of friends just like those people. I had the friends telling me that the world wasn't loving me and that God was. They were telling me time and time again that the one I needed to be with was calling to me and was right in front of me! And I had the type of friends who said that God was just a side thing to go to and that the world was more fun for me. The same way that when you have the sweet loving guy and the "bad boy" who just used you (if you don't know what I mean you've obviously never watched about 80% of romance movies)

The friends say that the bad boy suits you more and makes you more fun while the sweet one is "boring". While the other friends are telling you that the caring person is better in the end. You have to make the choice of who you are going to listen to. Unfortunately most people will listen to the wrong person.

Another thing is that the one you choose is the one you will start to become like. When a person chooses the wrong guy/girl to be with if they are a really bad person you will start to see the person you love change into somebody else... And if it's goes too far you can barely eve recognize them in the end.

"Who are you? I still love you because I know the person you are underneath it all...But I can't see that person at all right now."

The same way I would think that about people, weather it was my friend being changed or the person I loved being changed, I realized that is what God was saying to me! No matter how tattered, torn, broken, hurt, how many holes were in my heart or walls around myself there was God kept taking me back! Part of me couldn't even understand this. "Why?" Just as I watched the person who loved my friend comfort them and thought "How are they able to do it?" I was thinking the same about God, but about a thousand times greater.

I felt like I was a dirty rag that was polluting the clean bowl of water in my mind. "The water is going to get dirty from me I don't deserve to be in it"

But in reality the water is running. The water was rinsing me out and kept pouring out and not a single spec of dirt could get into it. It could continually clean me and it would be fine. Why was I underestimating the grace and purity of God? I look back and I think "probably because it was too much for my mind to understand" because it is. I honestly can't fully grasp the grace and mercy I am continually offered! I'm so used to being treated badly and being judged and not forgiven that when God said He would take me back as many time as I need it was too much to handle. I find myself looking pathetic in a pool of tears as big as Alice's in Wonderland crying out to God "Forgive me!" but at the same time saying "I don't deserve to be forgiven why are you?!"

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I mess up. I go to the wrong person and I come crawling back to God with baggage and hurt and He takes it all and gives me a fresh start time and time and time again. And I can't comprehend this! I understand what I'm doing is wrong, I realize who is the better one to be with, and yet I keep messing things up. Someday I hope to look back at this and think that I've overcome it. To look back and think "look how far I've come!"

I'm not sure how to finish this because I know I'm "not finished yet". This is a continuing struggle and I'm working on it daily. Keeping up this lifestyle choice of being a christian is difficult but always worth it in the end. So I know that I will continue to have struggles after I write this and as I would like to say that this is in the past and that I've overcome it now but I can't honestly say I have. I want to end this on 3 things. The main thing I've learned from this is that God's forgiveness is more than anyone can fully understand but trust me on one thing; It's Real.

And a couple verses to remind us.

Colossians 1:13-14, Daniel 9:9, Matthew 11:28 (theres a LOT but these are my favorites)

And a side note.

In life with relationships most people can't recover once they've changed so much. But luckily with God you can go back to the person you are meant to be. After I didn't recognize the person in the mirror anymore God took me and helped me become not only myself again but the person He want's me to become for Him is slowly coming out as well.

Keeping the Faith,

C.A.M

p.s. I know it's kinda long, sorry!